The most important key to success?

Recall a time in the past 2-3 weeks where you succeeded in doing something that you felt good about. It can be simple or more complex. For example buying an item – a new outfit, a new suitcase, a desk. Cooking a new dish. Getting a new job. Finding information for a project or your job. Arranging an important meeting. Giving a presentation at work or to a client. Designing a new house or bridge or high rise building.

What do you think contributed to your success – that you had control over?

What I’m suggesting here is that we can control what goes on in our mind and heart. But we can’t control what goes on around us – other people, events. Although we can control our reaction to what goes on around us…..but that’s another discussion.

Listen to your self talk

Listen to yourself or anyone who succeeds at anything. Are you thinking about or talking about how difficult or impossible it is to do? How unsuited you are? How unlikely you are to succeed? No. The opposite.
You are confident.
You tell yourself things like:

“This is easy.”
“I can do this.”
“I’m sure I can find a way to do this”
“Other people have done this, so that means I can do it too.”
“This is exciting.”
“This is going to be great”
“I’m looking forward to a great outcome.”

Your mindset acts like a filter

From a positive mindset – attitude – you see and hear and find the answers you need to succeed. A positive mindset “opens” you to answers and solutions. A “negative” mindset “closes” you off.

Your attitude or internal state of being (what you are thinking or how you are feeling) acts like a filter – only allowing matching information to come to you.

Once you understand that you control your success by your attitude or mindset or thinking or expectations – then you are in the “driver’s seat” – so to speak. You know you can adjust the results you get in life by adjusting what you choose to think.


two men leaning in table

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Remember a time when things went well?

In general terms, how were you feeling? What were you thinking?

Generally positive? Generally negative?

I’m sure you were feeling generally positive.

That’s the key to on-going success….


What have driving and law of attraction got in common?

As a trainer and mentor, I’m always looking for easy ways to explain “how law of attraction works” in our life. Analogies and metaphors are a good starting point when it comes to understanding abstract concepts like law of attraction.

What have driving and law of attraction got in common?

The analogy of “driving” is a great for understanding “how LOA works in your life”  because most people have either learnt to drive a car or know others who have. When things are happening with ease in your life, then it’s like driving in gear.  And when you are in struggle or frustration mode, then that’s like driving in reverse but expecting to go forward.  It’s simply won’t happen, will it?

When it comes to LOA, you are the one in the driver’s seat as it were. What you put out – energetically – LOA brings back to you “in kind”.  By “in kind” I’m referring to the types of people and experiences that appear in your life.  The amount of ease or frustration you experience.

Law of attraction is your mirror

When you focus your attention – when you focus your thinking  – for example – when you look for the positives in a person or situation – then you are in effect “in gear” (in the flow) and at those times you are attracting more matching people and events. “Matching” – not in a literal sense as in the exact same people and events – but “matching ” in the sense of other experiences and interactions of a positive nature that will please you. Conversely, when you are complaining, or lamenting that things aren’t  “happening” as you want them to – then you are in effect driving in reverse and wondering why you aren’t moving forward. LOA is your mirror. It mirrors your energetic output exactly. This is a subtle yet very important distinction in understanding how LOA works in your life.

Are you moving towards or away from your desires?

Often people will identify a specific person or object they want in their life. They might use a vision board or affirmations or visualize themselves with said person or object.  After all, that’s what most teach that you need to do to attract what you want. Focus on it – almost to the point of obsession.

But if you have been working with law of attraction for any length of time and especially if you are new to the idea of how it works in your like – then it’s important to understand that the feeling you have as you affirm or visualize etc – is really your key to understanding whether or not you are headed in the direction of what you want or if you are actually back tracking – moving away – energetically speaking.

Tuning into how you are “really” feeling

It takes practice to become attuned to how you are “really” feeling.  It takes practice to accurately identify the subtle feelings you have as you think about things you want. Are you “really” feeling relaxed?  Confident? Positive excitement and anticipation – much like children do as they anticipate their birthday or Xmas? Or are you actually feeling uncomfortable? Some angst?  Longing and yearning? Perhaps secretly fearing that you can’t really have what it is that you want?

How you are “really” feeling is your key to whether it’s headed your way or not. How you are “really” feeling inside, is your clue.  Not what you say you are or aren’t feeling but what you are “really” feeling.  And the more you want something, usually this is where you are most likely to trip up – to gloss over how you are really feeling. And that’s where the “real work” is. Managing and adjusting how you “really” feel on the various subjects that arise for you each day.